In Feast or Fallow

Right after the miscarriage, a good friend sent this song to Ross and I (Thanks Cameron). Needless to say, I fell in love with it.  The words are powerful. Every time I hear or sing this song it reminds me that God is in control and He is everything we need. Check it out:

In Feast Or Fallow
Words and Lyrics by Sandra McCracken

When the fields are dry, and the winter is long

Blessed are the meek, the hungry, the poor
When my soul is downcast, and my voice has no song
For mercy, for comfort, I wait on the Lord

Chorus

In the harvest feast or the fallow ground,
My certain hope is in Jesus found
My lot, my cup, my portion sure
Whatever comes, we shall endure

Whatever comes, we shall endure

On a cross of wood, His blood was outpoured

He Rose from the ground, like a bird to the sky
Bringing peace to our violence, and crushing death’s door
Our Maker incarnate, our God who provides.

Emman- u- el
Come, oh come,     Emman- u- el

When the earth beneath me crumbles and quakes
Not a sparrow falls, nor a hair from my head
Without His hand to guide me, my shield and my strength
In joy or in sorrow, in life or in death

Tragedy Strikes

Three months ago today, Ross and I experienced a tragedy that will always be a part of us. And I want to share our story with you.

Tragedy strikes all of us. Struggles and trials in life are definite. It is not an issue of if they will come but when. Tragedy is never convenient or timely.

Our story:

July 12th was a glorious day!  Ross and I had been hoping and praying for this day for almost 3 years...a positive pregnancy test! It brought tears...tears of joy! Then on August 3rd we lost our little precious one. Then more tears came...tears of grief. Miscarriage sucks!!!  The journey for us since then has been difficult. I would be lying if I said we have it all together. We have struggled with depression, anger, denial, envy, fear, defeat, loneliness and so much more. Our hearts simply broken...a gut-wrenching pain that I wish on no one.

In all of this, we still have hope! We know that scripture speaks truth and it says, "And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose." (Romans 8:28) 

Ross and I have been called...we are children of God and therefore we know that even though our hearts are broken, this brokenness is for good. This good is to the glory of God. I know that even though this time is hard that it is for the greater story of God working in our lives to sanctify us, making us more like His son, Christ Jesus. This in no way means that we don't ask why or that we understand it all...it simply means that we know Christ is our goal. He will lead us through this valley even though days are dark and normalcy seems to be a foreign concept.

To our little one:

You were planted on earth to be born into heaven....never having to face the brokenness of this fallen world. One day we will worship the King for eternity together. I can't wait to hear your voice singing praises to our Lord, Jesus Christ. We love you and we miss you!